The very best in humorous scripts and sketches.

Probably the funniest free scripts on the internet!

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Humorous Scripts: Author: Douglas Brown
LOCK UP YER BINS by Doug Brown

Councils told to look at charging for bin collections

Fergie: Councils are bangin’ on again aboot microchips in wheelie bins, sayin’Scottish hooseholds are generatin’ an annual 1.1 tonnes o’ garbage.

Hector: Whit’s yer point Fergie?

Fergie: Well, I jist don’t see whit aw the fuss is aboot!

Hector: Howsat Fergie! Dae yer think there’ll be a lot more recycing?

Fergie: Naw! First buy yersell a bin padlock. Then fly tip yer bulky stuff, use yer neighbours bin furra middle-sized stuff an wie ra rest huve a wee bonfire – in someone elses gerden!

Hector: That’s clever Fergie yer could even get a reward fur havin’ an empty bin, but surely the neigbours’ll jist go oot an buy a padlock fur their binsl!

Fergie: Aye! But that’s when plan B comes intae action. Aboot 3 months intae bin chargin’ it’ll get solved fur us!

Hector: Ah’m loast fur wurds!

Fergie: Efter 3 months of yer landed gentry huv’nty padlock bins, ah’ll guarantee ye’ll be able tae buy a wee gadget fur a few quids on the Internet tae reset yer microchip!

Hector: Magic!!

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